There was once a fierce Croatian pirate known far and wide as Very Dark Beard, who terrorized the Aegean Sea. On his way elsewhere, Very Dark Beard ship wrecked on Italy’s heel of the boot, Apulia.
Much of his cargo washed ashore with him clinging atop. The native Apulians instantly threatened him with walking the plank right there on the beach but he saved the day by showing them how to plant cuttings of the native grape stock called Crljenak.
After many years and glorious harvests, Mr. Beard slipped away and surfaced somewhere in El Dorado, California, quite possibly near the very grape ranch of Andy and Elizabeth Standeven.
Pirate wine is not for the faint at heart or foolish by nature. Consume with care.